To say I sold my soul for an shiny in-adamant object is an understatement. I didn’t stop there . I sold my time, mindset, body, overall health, and friend group just to name a few.
My Time:Time is one of the biggest variables that we all get judged by. How long can you endure? How long does it take you to recover from an injury? How long could you stay focus? How long does it take for you to get in the correct offense or the time it takes to recognize the defense being played. How long does it take you to recover after making a mistake and making the next play? In order to be successful, I had to sell off my previous notion; that I had all day to make a decision. It was harped on to me by coaches that I couldn’t be lackledasiing around. I had to always be going game speed because time matters!
My Mindset : I had to sell off my previous mindset before being a student athlete. In order to survive as a student athlete I quickly had to adopt a mindset of delusion. NARPS may not understand this but they have the luxury of seeing a thing and accepting it as it is; whereas we as student athletes have a different gear in our brain that allows us to see what it could be if we put in the work , stay consistent and put the team first. A great example is walking into a competition against the number 1 team in the nation who hasn’t loss a game / match in over year. A NARP would look at that scenario and most likely think “Well there’s a reason they’re ranked number 1 and haven’t loss yet. Besides they have home court advantage and it’s majority their fans in attendance , so we really shouldn’t get our hopes up because they’re mostly likely going to win.” Seems like a common mindset to have for most but when you factor in the mindset of a student athlete you have the exact opposite mindset . All of a sudden, even though the odds may not be stacked in the student athletes favor; they still believe that with the right focus, preparation, teamwork and game plan; that this competition is a more than winnable opportunity. That mindset is the single reason why the NCAA March Madness is as popular as it is. People delight in seeing if the team that wasn’t picked to win it, win against a team that’s higher ranked. If people went just off the rankings or the historical statistics of each team; the viewership would plummet. Why even bother watching. I learned that to have a chance to compete as a student athlete at any level; my previous mindset had to go. If I wanted to increase my chance of being successful , I had to sell off the previous mindset I had.
My Body / Overall Health - In the pursuit of playing at the collegiate level, I’ll never forget getting injured and going to the doctor to be told that I had to stay off of my leg for 12 weeks before playing again. In my mind this meant that while I was resting , and nursing my injury that someone else was getting better than me. Needless to say I was back in the gym in less than half the time. Fearing for my overall health and upset that I wasn’t listening to exactly what the doctors prescribed to me; my parents often times peppered me with endless questions about why I was heading back to the gym before I was recommended to do so by a medical professional. The concern for my wellbeing was more than understandable given the fact that many times while I was being asked these questions on the way to the gym; I was hopping on one leg while using the hallway walls to help keep me upright as I made my way to the car. Even if my parents didn’t see me , they for certainly heard me thumping around , just trying to keep my balance and move about. Yet and still I replied to my parent’s concern by reminded them of the pro athletes I watched on television played with an injury or had the flu. In my mind it was the necessary step that was required to turn the good to great. The amateur to pro . The interested to the committed. In order to get where I ultimately wanted to go with my sport; I had to sell off my body and overall health to help ensure I had a chance to make it because that’s what the greats did.
My Friend Group: It was once said that “ If you show me your friends, I’ll show you your future.” Before being a student athlete I had the luxury of being able to be friend with anyone I saw most often. There was not much of a thought process beyond that. If I saw you at the bus stop everyday; we were friends. If I saw you at the cafeteria ? You guess it , we were friends. If we were teammates? Yep. We friends. There wasn’t any expectation with those friendships but to be nice to each other and that was about it. Being a student athlete required me to get rid of this low barrier of entry mindset to accumulate friends.
All of a sudden NARPS gave me the “ick” and even those that were student athletes often times didn’t make the cut. In order to get to where I wanted to go I needed to be around those that understood the pain, the grind and the life of being a student athlete. I just didn’t want the awkwardness of trying to explain this lifestyle to a NARP because when I’ve done so in the past it felt as though I was whining and was looking for sympathy or it felt like I was just a source of entertainment for them. They seemed to be amused by some of the daily occurrences I was experiencing as a student athlete; which was infuriating. I found myself having to say to them quite often “ Listen , joker. This ain’t funny! This is my effin life!” Once calmer heads prevailed I later realized they weren’t trying to be malicious and it was nothing personal. They just didn’t understand my lifestyle and how could they.
I thought this would be alleviated by just associating myself with other student athletes but that proved to be a faulty strategy as well. I quickly found out that not all student athletes are about that life. Not all student athletes want to get extra work in, study game film and geek out about stats and how to get better for the next competition. Some were just here for a good time. Some were just floating off their talent. Some were super negative and some were already mentally checked out; and only wanted to talk about what school they were going to transfer to next.
As you would imagine the quantity of friends that I had dwindled from the days of pre student athlete but the people I settled on understood me. They understood the grind, the climb, dealing with the spotlight and the level of detail necessary to achieve the amazing season we were able to achieve as a team this year. 35 wins and no losses.
We the best ( *DJ Khaled voice). So why do I feel like a loser? Don’t get me wrong, winning a championship and playing a big role on that team during my senior year was pretty dope but now what; is the question I keep asking myself while Im’m in the career center on campus doing my best to figure it out before I get thrusted out into the real world. The Career Center Advisor was doing her best to help me by asking seemingly easy questions but for some reason I just didn’t have any answers for her. Up until this point I felt like this portion of life would just take care of itself but when she ask me to create a resume and to list references; I knew two things. 1. I was cooked. 2. I wish I was more prepared starting my Freshman year; rather than trying to cram all this information in during my senior , right before it’s time to graduate.
This not a sympathy story to don’t break out the violins and slow playing music. I’m good. It took me a long time to get there and it certainly wasn’t over night but I finally got to a place where I can provide some assistance to YOU on your journey as a student athlete before it’s too late. Well, it’s never too late but if you wait until as late as I did; you’re more susceptible of graduating and working a job you don’t want to work but you have to because you have bills. Living in a place that may not be the safest but that’s all you can afford. Sitting back regretting some of your decisions while you were in college, wishing you could live a different outcome.
That sounded a little harsher than I intended. I’m not shaming those that have the lifestyle that I most previously described and if thats a lifestyle that you look forward to living; that’s more than okay and there’s no shame in that. This is for those student athletes that are going to college that actually want to not only graduate but also live a lifestyle that is benefited by all the sacrifice athletically as well as academically that being a student athlete entails.
The blog post on this page will be dedicated to assisting you on your journey. It’s goals is to help you identify, explore, cultivate and secure career opportunities that you didn’t think were possible or that you didn’t even know they existed. Tune in every week for more blogs that will be essential for you to live a life of no regret as a student athlete an will enable you to use the game you love so much without feeling like you were the one getting used.
Before I let you go, I want to share one tip I learned far too late while being in the Career Center during my senior year as a student athlete in college.
If at the end of your career as a student athlete in college the only thing people can say positive about you is that you slam a ball, run a touchdown or high jump 7 feet high; congratulations , you played your self. If the only people you can put down on paper to serve a s reference for you to start your career, is your coach and maybe the athletic director and you don’t even want to work in athletics as a career; you’ve loss!
Grade Point Average (GPA) has its place but networking and cultivating relationships go a lot further than a GPA. If done right, you should have people from every corner of the university be able to sing your praises without mentioning your sport. They should be able to speak to your level of intelligence , humor, friendliness and ability to build community. People like the staff members working at the dining hall, Vice President, Director of Residence Life, Librarian , Campus Police; just to name a few. You never know if these interactions could be the calling card from you gaining a career opportunity after you eligibility has elapsed or be the sole reason of why you weren’t awarded the opportunity to get the interview in the first place.
… because like your sport; your career is not going to wait until you figure it out. You gotta be ready before it gets here. We’re here to help you do that.
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